Serious Sam 3

If you have never played a Serious Sam game, what the hell is wrong with you? Do you hate the FPS genre? Do you hate computer gaming in general? Why do you even have Steam at all? You are not a bad person, but man, it is time you turned your life around and experienced what this is all about. Everyone has their own personal Serious Sam experience- I was but a scared boy when the original came out, and it was a discount title. It was one of the first times that I realized that “discount” and “video games” didn’t necessarily mean bad, and one of the reasons Steam Daily Deal exists to this day. After I played the game, I emerged a grizzled, beer-guzzling man.

The Serious Sam games play like Doom or Painkiller on cocaine. There is no cover and there is no regenerating red jelly health, it’s just hordes of enemies and your wits, big guns and reflexes. All you do is run around in circles (we call this Circle Strafing) while shooting at screaming, headless, bomb wielding terrorists. Yes, screaming AND headless. Again if you have never played a Serious Sam game, the first two hold up great. Go purchase one immediately, they are $1.49 and it is the best $1.49 you could possibly spend on a video game and possibly in YOUR LIFE. Yes that’s right, there’s not a lot you can get for one dollar and forty-nine cents these days. As far as deals go, the best possible things you can get for less than a dollar fifty are two tacos from Jack in the Box and Serious Sam the First Encounter. You know what you can’t get for $1.49? Actual food that isn’t ramen, any tall can of beer that isn’t expired malt liquor, a single shot of liquor, or a pack of condoms (3). As if you needed any more reason, go buy Serious Sam The First Encounter right now, dammit.

So after you’ve played that, the question is should you play Serious Sam 3 BFE? Let’s look at the facts. What does BFE stand for? Nobody knows. Doesn’t matter. Why is the game 90% off? Well, the starting price of $39.99 for a three year old game is a little silly so they had to knock 90% off of it. And the most important question of all: is the game as good as the previous installments? No, but it is still really fun.

What is a cyclops without an eye?  

There are some Serious issues to this game, for starters, the fact that you can’t dodge a lot of the enemies’ attacks, i.e., they are hitscan. This is bullshit, and who knows why Croteam put this feature in the game? But honestly it just ups the difficulty level, you don’t need to dodge if you kill the enemy first and it is just more of a test of your mettle. Also, the beginning of the game is not very fun, there are iron sights involved, which is the antithesis of the Serious Sam games. However I think Croteam put that in as a joke, because as soon as newer weapons are introduced the iron sights go by the wayside so I think they were messing with all of us. Basically, Serious Sam 3 BFE plays like the other Serious Sam games eventually but with better graphics- it might not be exactly as good but it is still really damn fun. For this reason the Verdict: BUY IT

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