THQ Nordic 80% off Weekend

This is somehow the first time I’ve heard of THQ Nordic, but not the first I’ve heard of these games. Holy cow these games are awesome. This is a great sale. Just look at their sale picture. There’s a cyborg, a scantily clad huntress, Cleopatra fighting back to back with Achilles and that molten lava boss from Dark Souls.

80% percent off of any of those things is totally worth it. But to really understand, we have to talk about the Nordic people. They are great. You might think they are a peace loving people. Maybe now. But back in the day, they basically invented ocean faring ships just so they could discover islands they could burn down.

Now, they don’t really do that stuff anymore. I think. In Sweden (maybe elsewhere?) they drink this stuff called Akvavit. It’s basically just rubbing alcohol with some weird spices in it. Sometimes it’s clear, sometimes it’s not. Sometimes it’s delicious, sometimes it isn’t. I’ll be honest, I drank a lot of it last time I was there. And if you drink just the right amount, you lose your desire to plunder foreign lands.

So THQ Nordic, maybe during a cold winter, they all got together and drank a bunch of Akvavit and thought, hey, you know what’s cooler than Diablo? Those Ancient Egyptians. And thus, Titan Quest was born.

Do you like old school ARPGs? Buy Titan Quest, it’s awesome.

Have you ever wanted to run around in circles at 500 mph while shooting some kind of full auto stake gun? Get Painkiller, it’s awesome.

Painkiller Black
Seriously if you haven’t played a Painkiller game what the hell is wrong with you

Do you like heavy metal and/or action figures and mashing buttons? Get Darksiders, it’s awesome.

Verdict: Systembolaget 

Sale Page Here



2K Weekend

There are a whole lot of deals this weekend. So many deals. And it’s not even really the weekend it’s Thursday. What day is this? Who knows. It’s not just 2K games that are on sale either. You’ve also got Dishonored which is on a free weekend, a space sim called Kinetic Void, and all the Metro games. The ones in the subway, you know what I’m talking about. The problem is how do you decide which Steam daily deal to purchase? At least you can try a few of them out for free. But if you are too lazy to try them yourself and you would rather purchase them blindly, letting them sit and grow moldy in your backlog for ages, untouched, like a Pristine Rotten Kiwi in DayZ, then you have come to the right place.

Let’s start with 2K Games weekend. 2K is pretty cool. They make/publish pretty decent games. The publisher/developer relationship in video games has never made much sense to me, but generally if a publisher sucks the game somehow ends up sucking, although this is not always the case. Anyways, 2K is A.O.K.

The Gamez:

Maybe you have heard of Sid Meier’s Civilization? I guess it’s kind of a big deal in the strategy world. Or as they say in the industry “4X.” The thing is with Civ V you have to figure out which Civilization game is the best. The problem is in order to compare Civ games and to determine which Civ is better it takes hundreds of hours because the damn games take so long to play. If you have never played Civilization before but you would like to try it, go ahead and play Civ V. But you are also going to want to pick up the Brave New World DLC which basically adds some stuff that should have been in the game in the first place. Personally, I like Civilization IV better than Civ V. The AI is not all messed up and neither is the UI. The combat is kind of lame though, so be forewarned…also watch out for Tokugawa that guy is an asshole.

Bioshock Infinite is a pretty good game, albeit a very polarizing one. It’s not really a Bioshock game so throw that out the window. The story is good, but it being about multiverses and time travel there are going to be lots of holes. Holes in the fabric of reality, I mean. It will either make sense to you or it won’t, everybody has their own interpretation of it. The biggest problem with the game is that most of the guns suck and they aren’t very fun to use. You can also only hold two at a time, which is dumb and pointless (thanks for that one, consoles). The second biggest problem with the game is that it had so much potential to be better. That’s not to say that it is a bad game, because it is a good game. But there were many game mechanics that felt either tacked on or unused that could have been much cooler than they were (i.e., flying around on metal rails is cool but not necessary most of the time). Anyways, it’s certainly worth playing.

There’s something to be said for the fact that Borderlands is more expensive than Borderlands 2. Borderlands 2 should be a better game than the first- it adds more weapons and more varied locales and the gameplay has remained unchanged. But the first one is probably better. Maybe because it felt more novel. The vast majority of the time in Borderlands 2 is spent fighting the same damn robots all the time. If you don’t choose an acid weapon you are basically screwed. The first Borderlands felt like it had more flexibility in types of weapons. The game is also hurt by the fact than any class can use any weapons just as effectively as any other. It makes you feel less special and I like to feel special because it’s a video game. But really, you should only buy this game if you have a friend(s) to play with because that’s what makes it fun, it’s like Diablo with guns.

XCOM is totally the best game on this list. Defend the USA (or Earth or whatever) by blowing away aliens with huge machine guns. There are gibs. You will cry when your squadmates die. This is the game to purchase, unless you are a whiny baby communist that can’t handle a challenge like a REAL MAN. Also, there are real women in the game, they make the best snipers for some reason. Plus you can give people funny names.

Anyways, all of these games are actually good and you will have a good time with any of them, so make up your damn mind already. But your best bet is totally XCOM.

Steam Summer Sale Day 7 Extravaganza

Screw these flash sales, forcing me to check and recheck every eight hours to make sure I’m not missing any kind of amazing deal. Don’t they know I need at least 12 hours of sleep? Just kidding, I don’t sleep. Not when there is voting to be done. That’s the great thing about the Summer Sale. It’s the time of year when everyone should be spending all of their time outside (except for you, Australia, we know you’re all ass backwards down there on the bottom of the world) but the problem with that is that the sun is harsh and unforgiving on pasty complexions and if you go to the beach the odds of getting sand kicked in your face rise exponentially. Luckily now we have reasons to stay indoors, reasons that will last all Summer.

So here’s the spread. We can easily remove half of the games from this list. Kerbal Space Program is fun and all if you’re in engineering or physics in college but it’s in Early Access and a little pricey. Final Fantasy XIV A Realm Reborn was basically made because everybody hated the first Final Fantasy XIV, it’s actually good now but at the same time you have to pay monthly and it ain’t a daily deal if you’re paying every month. A 25% discount for Child of Light is pretty sad so screw that, it will go on sale for way cheaper during the next sale. The Banner Saga is a gorgeous game that was actually successfully Kickstarted. It’s like you’re really playing a Viking, non-furry version of Disney’s Robin Hood. But $12.49 isn’t selling it for me. The most egregious offender in this list is Valve’s own Counter Stike: Global Offensive. What a perfect name because this deal is globally offensive. As a Valve game this thing needs to be at least 75% off. Don’t get me wrong the game is pretty fun and it’s way better than that piece of crap CSS but 50% off??? Really??? Fuck that.

The finalists are all pretty legit and they really offer something for everyone again. Batman Arkham Origins suffered from a tough release and if you haven’t played any of these games you might be better off playing Arkham Asylum or Arkham City, they are also on sale but for only $4.99 so they might be a better choice. That leaves us with Company of Heroes 2, Endless Space Emperor Edition, and Bioshock Infinite. These are all decent options and the question you ask yourself is do you want a WW2 RTS (that might not be as good as the original), a space 4X game, or a triple A FPS title? Bioshock Infinite isn’t as bad as the haters say and it’s not as good as the lovers say but it’s definitely worth playing. The story is cool, the weapons aren’t so cool and it had a LOT more potential but it’s still really entertaining plus that Elizabeth is a fox. For this reason: Winner: Bioshock Infinite Alternates: Company of Heroes 2/ Endless Space.

Steam Summer Sale Day 6 Extravaganza

We just keep rollin’ through the Summer Sale and here we are at Day 6. Hopefully your sanity and most of your wallet is in tact. The games are staying varied which is good for the most part, there appears to be a little something for everyone. I’m waiting for the day when every daily deal sale is a simulation “game.” Football Managers, Truck Simulators, Tractor Simulators. It’s an inevitability, like a hangover or death. All we can do is dread it. But for today we have a decent mix of games, but quite a few we can scratch right off the shopping list making the decision a little bit easier.

Murdered: Soul Suspect I begrudgingly remove, although it is an interest new IP with a pretty cool story and some interesting detective-based gameplay, the game is short and it is not a critical darling. It is also already 33% off after less than a month of being released. This all means that the price of this game is only going to continue to drop, so you might as well wait until it gets cheaper.

Blackguards was one of those Steam Early Access games that didn’t have the greatest release…notice a trend here? It is a turn-based RPG that is light on the RPG. Every encounter is a battle and you will lose. Balance is not something you will find here. Skip it.

Call of Doody: Ghosts should disappear right down the toilet where it belongs. And not only does the game suck it is also cheaper on Amazon anyways. Age of Wonders III is a really nice piece of fantasy 4X. It strikes a nice balance between strategy micromanaging and fantasy RPG. If that’s your thing and you have a few hundred hours to spare you can feel good about this purchase at 50% off but the price is a little steep compared to the other games here today.

Finalists for Steam Summer Sale Day 6: Splinter Cell: Blacklist, Metro: Last Light, Brothers: A Tale of Two Sons, Torchlight II and Fallout: New Vegas Ultimate Edition. Any of these games will be a worthy purchase and the deals are all decent. Splinter Cell: Blacklist really has some nice stealth gameplay and interesting options to complete missions. But the story is god awful and we are nitpicking here so let’s drop it. Metro: Last Light is loved nearly unanimously, but the “complete edition” thing is kind of misleading. There’s really only one DLC included worth playing and a few extra weapons. It’s also $19.99 on Amazon too. Torchlight II’s hours of loot-based gameplay make up for it’s weird story and let’s be honest this game is basically just Diablo III but better. New Vegas is the best FPS RPG since Vampire the Masquerade: Bloodlines, and it’s not even close. It’s just frustrating that the standalone game is 75% off but the Ultimate Edition is only 66% off.

Winner: Fallout New Vegas Ultimate Edition. Runner up: Torchlight II. You could potentially spend hundreds of hours on these games- and the Fallout New Vegas DLC is actually DLC done right, not just a big fuck you to gamers. They are four varied, interesting campaigns. Come back, Obsidian! At their price points you can’t go wrong.

Steam Summer Sale Day 5 Extravaganza

Steam Summer Sale Day 5 is a real looker. These are some pretty good deals all around, and it appears the open world zombie survival games have finally taken a seat in the back. With the exception of Nether- which isn’t zombies per say, but more mutants. Anyways. I’d like to take a moment to remind everyone to vote on the games that you would like to be featured during the Flash Sales. There are two reasons for this. The first being you have a better chance of being able to buy a game you like. But more importantly, the more you vote, the more you get trading cards. Don’t write these off. You can sell them for like fifty cents each and then buy yourself some cheap ass games!!!

This is gonna be real tricky to narrow these babies down. They are all good choices and they are all so cheap! This price for Arma III is pretty good for such a recent game, however it’s so much more money than the rest of the games that it’s going in the skip pile. Now you don’t have to feel bad about any of these other choices- they are all steep discounts for good games. But because Insurgency’s discount isn’t as good as the other games we are going to take that off the list as well.

So let’s break the finalists down into a few groups to better separate them:

The Ridiculous Games
Saints Row IV, Lego Movie the Videogame, Surgeon Simulator 2013. In Saints Row IV you play as the President of the U.S. of we don’t take kindly to your types coming around here, those types being filthy Communist illegal aliens. But illegal aliens from another planet. Who must be super punched. Lego Movie the Videogame continues the somewhat surprising run of critically and culturally successful Lego videogames but you are better off playing a different edition if you haven’t played them before- Batman or Star Wars or something along those lines. Surgeon Simulator is worth watching gameplay videos of at least, it’s hilarious.
Winner: Saints Row IV.

The Roguish Types
 Rogue Legacy, Faster Than Light. Both good options and interesting takes on the roguelike-like genre- get in, have some fun, die. Become reborn, see if you can survive for longer. What it comes down to is would you rather upgrade a spaceship or a castle? And would you rather be afflicted with engine failure or Irritable Bowel Syndrome? Rogue Legacy narrowly edges out FTL because of its slightly more rewarding gameplay along with its vaguely Ghosts and Goblins meets Castlevania vibe
Winner: Rogue Legacy.

The Serious Games
Dark Souls Prepare to Die Edition, Nether. Nether was one of them early access games that actually got completed…but the player base is reportedly about 300 die hard players and everyone else just gets shot in the face when they spawn. Other than that, it’s like Day Z with mutants, kinda. Dark Souls is a phenomenal game that requires you to have a controller. But it is one of the most unique gaming experiences you can have these days. The only problem is the sequel came out so it might be kind of hard to find actual humans to help you fight bosses these days.
Winner: Dark Souls.

You can’t go wrong with any of these deals today. But Dark Souls is a game everyone should experience, especially at 75% off. Prepare to Die baby! Verdict: Dark Souls. Runners up: Saints Row IV/Rogue Legacy.

Steam Summer Sale Day 3 Extravaganza

Day 3 of the Steam Summer Sale is here. Or should we call it Day Z because of all these zombie games? Nah, we shouldn’t. It’s Day 3. I’d like to take a moment to warn against Drinking and Dealing. This can be advantageous or detrimental depending on how your budget goes. But the fact of the matter is, the longer the clock ticks on a sale game and the more beers you drink have a direct, mathematical relationship to the likelyhood of the purchase of a game. Benjamin Franklin once said “A man’s Steam daily deal purchases are on a sober man’s wishlist,” or something like that. The point is every purchase makes more since if you’ve had a few.

First we have the early access games: Project Zomboid (a funny word for zombie) 7 Days to Die (from zombies) and Wasteland 2, a zombified game and an OBVIOUS RIPOFF of the beloved Fallout games. So let’s take all three of these off the table. The eponymous Age of Empires II- a game almost everyone played on their piece of crap family computer that didn’t even have a dedicated graphics card wayyyy too long after it came out- can probably be skipped unless you’re really looking for some nostalgia. The HD tag the game has been given is a poor joke, much like those HD sunglasses from the infomercial that I bought that fail to make the real world any more high definition.

Just like that we have it narrowed down to five games: Contagion, Terraria, The Stanley Parable, Dragon Age Origins Ultimate Edition and Skyrim. These games are all pretty different from each other and the deals are pretty good. You can feel OK with paying any of these prices too, but the Stanley Parable deal could be a little bit better so let’s scratch that impulse buy. We have standards and 60% off isn’t cutting it right now. If you haven’t played Skyrim by now…well, this is a good price to give it a shot, but while fun, the game ultimately feels like you don’t have a real impact on the inhabitants of the world. You are also better off with just Dragon Age by itself rather than the Ultimate Edition. It’s also on sale at 75% off. Terraria is kind of sort of like a 2d Minecraft…but it’s only $1.99. Contagion is a more old-school zombie co-op experience what with zombies needing to be shot in the face in order to get taken down and what not. It’s like Zombie Panic mixed with L4D but ultimately it falls a little flat.

So we are left with three games: Dragon Age Origins Ultimate Edition, Skyrim, and Terraria. As far as content goes, if a big snowy open world is your thing now is the time to try it out.

Verdict: Skyrim. Runner Ups: Terraria/Dragon Age Origins Ultimate Edition.

Steam Summer Sale Day 2 Extravaganza

Well, Day 1 has come and gone now we have a little bit of respite on day 2 of the Steam Summer sale because there aren’t really any out of this world crazy deals today. It’s not a fire sale. It’s not a pull the ripcord while pulling the trigger kind of a day. Which can be a nice change on the ol’ pocket book or it can be highly disappointing however you look at it. Like last time, let’s start with the process of elimination to narrow these game choices down.

Dynasty Warriors 8 Complete Edition Xtreme Legends is obviously going to be pretty badass but at $24.99 it’s out of the running. In Bound by Flame you apparently play the role of a mercenary possessed by a fire demon tasked with melting seven Ice Lords. Now that’s a premise, but for 23.99 we’re better off melting seven Ice Cubes with a bottle of Wild Turkey. Plague Inc Evolved and Prison Architect are both early access games, granted the Prison Architect price is tempting but if it’s easy to avoid early access games that’s what we’re going to do.

That leads us to the finalists for Day 2: State of Decay, The Walking Dead Season Two, Game Dev Tycoon, RPG Maker VXAce and Amnesia: A Machine for Pigs. Amnesia: A Machine for Pigs was already skipped for the same price so we might as well skip that one again. Game Dev Tycoon and RPG Maker VXAce are both niche games. If you feel like making relatively bland, unironically pixelated RPGs than RPG Maker VXAce might be for you…however there’s a free version you can try out so you are better of with that if you’re on the fence. Skip. Game Dev Tycoon is a nice little casual game for those who want to experience the joys/pains of making games without actually having to make them. Instead, you are probably better off following individual game developers on Twitter, and seeing how they react to rabid “fans” who accuse them of ruining their favorite games. It’s much more accurate and it’s free.

That leaves us with State of Decay and The Walking Dead Season Two. Both of these are pretty good choices with a few easy outs. State of Decay is cheaper and possibly more content filled- but it’s not as good of a game. If you loved season one of Walking Dead you will love season two, if you didn’t, then you won’t and this won’t change your mind. State of Decay is like Project Zomboid, Day Z, and Dead Island all wrapped into one not-so-nice little package. If you’re looking to get into the new really popular genre of “scavenge for stuff and build a shelter to survive the zombie apocalypse” this is the place to start. If you have tried those games but didn’t enjoy them so much there isn’t a lot extra here to change your mind.

Verdict: 75% off State of Decay. Runner Up/Alternate: 50% off Walking Dead Season 2.