XCOM 2 Daily Deal

Earth, 2017. Everybody knows the Reptilians have seized control of the dominant powers of the globe, and they are desperate to warm the planet to better suit their ideal cold-blooded living conditions. What most people don’t realize- and I can’t believe I’m telling you this, but you have a right to know- is that the GREYS are the ones pulling the strings.

You see, the Reptilians are just pawns in the Grey game that is galactic destruction. So that’s where XCOM 2 comes in. You are XCOM, an elite (failed) tactical team led by the GMan from Half Life. Also sometimes you fight GMen? Well he was always sort of an ambiguous character.

Anyways, you have to assemble your crack squad of people that you name after your friends, enemies, Duke Nukem, and Hollywood Movie Stars. It will probably end up that half of your squad will serve as meat shields for the other half- you can bet that Duke Nukem (Heavy Weapons Guy) and Michelle Rodriguez (Sniper) are going to level up all the way while poor Jimmy from shop class is going to take some plasma for the team.

Seriously though, unless you were born without a heart (which would make you a Grey, and therefore the enemy) this game will make you feel things for these silent heroes that make up the XCOM force. Get it while it’s hot and 60% off. 

Day of the Tentacle 70% off

In Day of the Tentacle you play a giant tentacle who flies a TIE fighter and tries to squash the Rebellion (AKA the Whale Menace).

In Day of the Tentacle you play a giant tentacle who flies a TIE fighter and tries to squash the Rebellion (AKA the Whale Menace).

This version of the game has been remastered by Double Fine. They are basically super good at drawing I guess, this game has less pixels than the original, it’s real smooth like.

Anyways, Steam Daily Deal loves a good adventure game and they also love a good Lucas Arts game and they love a good 70% off, if you like moving your mouse cursor across a static screen for 15 (1.5) minutes before getting frustrated and alt tabbing to go look at the answer on GameFAQs you should probably get this game. Also if you like good games you should probably get this game.

 

Why Does Batman Wear the Mask?

Let me tell you all you need to know about Batman: Arkham City being 75% off. Right here. Anyways, let’s get real.

INT. LAND CRUISER JOSTLING OVER UNEVEN TERRAIN - DAY

Three Hooded Men guarded by East European Militia. A third
Militia drives. Next to him is a nervous, bespectacled man.



EXT. AIRSTRIP, EASTERN EUROPE - DAY

An airstrip overlooking a grey city rocked by artillery
fire. A bland CIA Operative, flanked by Special Forces Men,
stands in front of a commuter plane. CIA Man watches the
Land Cruiser pull up, hard. The Militia Men jump out of the
vehicle.
The Driver shoves the bespectacled man in front of the CIA
Man.

2.





CIA MAN
Dr. Pavel, I'm CIA.
Dr. Pavel nods, nervous. CIA Man hands the Driver a
briefcase.



DRIVER
He wasn't alone.
CIA Man, confused, spots the Hooded Men. He turns to Dr.
Pavel.



CIA MAN
You don't get to bring friends.

DR. PAVEL

(SHAKEN)
They are not my friends.

DRIVER
Don't worry, no charge for them.

CIA MAN
Why would I want them?

DRIVER
They were trying to grab your
prize. (Smiles.) They work for the
mercenary. The masked man.



CIA MAN

(EXCITED)
Bane?
The Driver nods. CIA Man turns to his Special Forces Men.



CIA MAN
Get 'em on board - I'll call it in.





EXT. SKIES OVER MOUNTAIN RANGE - DAY

The commuter plane struggles over snow-capped mountains.



INT. MAIN CABIN, COMMUTER PLANE - CONTINUOUS



The three Hooded Men kneel by the cargo door, handcuffed.
CIA Man grabs Hooded Man 1.

CIA MAN
What are you doing in the middle of
my operation?

3.


Hooded Man 1 says nothing. CIA Man pulls out a handgun.
The flight plan I just filed with
the Agency lists me, my men, and
Dr. Pavel here. But only one of
you.
CIA Man opens the cargo door. Special Forces hang Hooded Man
1 out into the howling wind - CIA Man shouts above the wind.



CIA MAN

FIRST ONE TO TALK GETS TO STAY ON
MY AIRCRAFT! (Cocks weapon.)

SO...WHO PAID YOU TO GRAB DR.

PAVEL?!


Nothing. CIA Man fires out the open door and the Special
Forces yank Hooded Man 1 back in, clubbing him quiet.

CIA MAN

HE DIDN'T FLY SO GOOD! WHO WANTS TO

TRY NEXT?!


The Soldiers grab Hooded Man 2, hang him out the door.

CIA MAN

TELL ME ABOUT BANE! WHY DOES HE

WEAR THE MASK?!


The prisoner says nothing. CIA Man presses the gun to the
man's hood - he cocks the gun...nothing.

CIA MAN

LOT OF LOYALTY FOR A HIRED GUN!



THIRD PRISONER (O.S.)
Or he's wondering why someone would
shoot a man before throwing him out
of an aeroplane.


CIA Man turns to the Third Prisoner. Shuts the cargo door.

CIA MAN
Wiseguy, huh? At least you can
talk. Who are you?



THIRD PRISONER
We are nothing. We are the dirt
beneath your feet. And no one cared
who I was until I put on the
mask...


CIA Man, wary, approaches the Third Prisoner - pulls off his
hood, revealing a dark mask with a breathing apparatus. The
eyes behind it are cold. Still. This is Bane.

4.





BANE
Who we are does not matter. What
matters is our plan.

CIA MAN

(FASCINATED)
If I pull this off, will you die?

BANE
It would be extremely painful.



CIA MAN
You're a big guy -

BANE
For you.



CIA MAN

(UNNERVED)
Was being caught part of your plan?

BANE
Of course. Dr. Pavel refused our
offer in favor of yours. We had to
know what he told you about us.

DR. PAVEL
Nothing! I said nothing!



CIA MAN
Why not just ask him?

BANE
He would not have told us.



CIA MAN
You have methods.

BANE
Him, I need healthy. You present no
such problem.
CIA Man laughs for the Special Forces' benefit. A heavy bass
tone is rising. The Sergeant looks out the window.





EXT. SKIES OVER MOUNTAIN RANGE - CONTINUOUS

The commuter plane is dwarfed by a massive transport plane
looming over it, dangerously close...

5.





INT. MAIN CABIN, COMMUTER PLANE - CONTINUOUS

The plane lurches. The noise is building.

SERGEANT
Sir?



CIA MAN
Well congratulations, you got
yourselves caught. What's the next
step of your master plan?



BANE
Crashing this plane...



EXT. MOUNTAINS - CONTINUOUS



The ramp of the transport opens... Four men leap out on
tethers - dropping towards the commuter plane, two each
side...





INT. MAIN CABIN, COMMUTER PLANE - CONTINUOUS

The Spacial Forces react to the turbulence from the plane
above. CIA Man looks at Bane.

BANE

(RISING)
With no survivors.
A Special Forces soldier spins around - an Armed Man is
outside the window. Bang -





EXT. SKIES OVER MOUNTAIN RANGE - CONTINUOUS

Two men shoot through the windows, the other two attach
grapples to the fuselage - give the thumbs up - hoists start
to pull and the tail of the commuter plane is lifted,
unnaturally.



INT. COCKPIT, COMMUTER PLANE - CONTINUOUS

The Pilots battle the controls as the plane tilts forward.

6.





INT. MAIN CABIN, COMMUTER PLANE - CONTINUOUS

Like lightning, Bane has the CIA Man is his handcuffed arms,
legs wrapped around a seat back, The entire cabin upends.
Tumbling chaos - Soldiers falling - Bane cracks CIA Man's
neck and drops him onto the Sergeant - they tumble down the
plane, smashing into the cockpit door with a terminal thud.
Dr. Pavel, strapped in, pushes against the seat in front of
him - the plane vibrates, trying to tear itself apart.





EXT. ATLAS MOUNTAINS - CONTINUOUS

The men climb the tail of the smaller plane as it dangles
helplessly above the mountains. Its wings shear off.





INT. MAIN CABIN, COMMUTER PLANE - CONTINUOUS

Bane breaks his handcuffs as if they were plastic, then
opens his legs and drops down the cabin, somersaulting
gracefully and using his arms to stop himself halfway down,
by Dr. Pavel.



EXT. SKIES OVER MOUNTAIN RANGE - CONTINUOUS

The men attach explosives to the tail, then jump away,
swinging out as the tail explodes.



INT. MAIN CABIN, COMMUTER PLANE - CONTINUOUS

An explosion takes off the rear door of the cabin - the
Armed Men drop through the smoke on cables.
A body bag is lowered into the cabin. Bane lies it on the
seat backs next to Dr. Pavel and unzips it to reveal a body
the same age and build as Dr. Pavel.


Bane rips Dr. Pavel's sleeve - pulls out a length of
surgical tubing - pushes a needle into Dr. Pavel's arm -
runs the tube to the body's arm... Dr. Pavel watches,
horrified, as Bane starts compressions on the body's chest,
drawing Dr. Pavel's blood across the tube and into the
body...


An Armed Man pulls Hooded Man 1 up through the cabin and
out. Bane stops Hooded Man 2.

7.





BANE
Friend. They expect one of us in
the wreckage.
The man nods, unhooks himself, takes Bane's arm.



HOODED MAN 2
Have we started the fire?

BANE

(NODS)
The fire rises.
Hooded Man 2 hands Bane his line. Bane clips it around Dr.
Pavel, takes out a knife and cuts Dr. Pavel's seat belt. Dr.
Pavel panics, flails. Bane takes his arms. Gentle.



BANE
Calm, Doctor. Now is not time for
fear...
Bane slides Dr. Pavel out of his seat. They hang in the
vertical, windblown cabin. Bane takes out a detonator.



BANE
That comes later.
Bane presses the detonator - the cabin drops from around
them, revealing the terrifying drop to the peaks below. Dr.
Pavel screams as they are hoisted up towards the transport,
and we -

CUT TO:
Our dicks in our hands


Verdict: For You. 

Monaco

Monaco has been the Steam Daily Deal before. But back then it was part of a free weekend. A free weekend is the best thing for a game like Monaco- you can play it for a few hours, get in and have some fun, and then never touch it again. Which is really indicative of what Monaco is: you get in, steal some stuff, get out, and then never look back. That’s not to say that there isn’t replay value in Monaco because there is. But it may or may not sink its hooks into you.

There are a few things that have changed from my last writeup but core gameplay remains unchanged. There have been two updates. One that introduces PvP called The Architect’s Patch, which is the Architect from the Matrix movies. The other update is called Monaco’s Final Campaign: Fin. We ca assume that Fin adds a new class to play as, a super smart, highly evolved, cybernetic dolphin that can survive on land through its use of bipedal robot legs. Also, the dolphin communicates with it’s mind because it lacks the vocal cords of a human. Also, Fin can travel through time, which can be advantageous in a heist situation. As you would probably imagine, Fin uses this ability to get more gold when other players are unable to. Some people will probably complain that Fin is overpowered, but he is so unanimously fun to play that he will never be nerfed.

It’s like trying to find the bathroom in a department store when you really have to pee

Anyways, Monaco: What’s Yours is Mine is currently on sale at 75% off for $3.74. It is best experience with friends, or online with strangers who you can totally dick over. Or possibly some combination of both. If you like frenetic, fast paced multiplayer action with an emphasis on stealth and/or sprinting around than you will most likely enjoy Monaco. If you hate teamwork and you would rather shoot than run, Monaco might not be for you. Verdict: Buy it.

Steam Summer Sale: The Hangover

Here we have a game where you can play as the so-called heroic warrior or the powerful sorceress while you go on some kind of magical quest game for 1 to 4 players, and of course you will need strength, courage and some good dice rolls to survive the dangers you face and beat your opponents to the “centre” of the board. That’s all mostly a direct quote and ah who am I kidding after the Steam Summer Sale I don’t think I have it in me to sit down and play a god damn digital board game. “Imagine Monopoly with Dragons!” is what it says, only instead of choosing a silly top hat for a player character you choose some big breasted bimbo and instead of trying to screw over Grandma with that hotel on Park Place you’re trying to become the pied piper or some crap, I don’t know. Bad timing for Talisman.

Anyways, let’s take this moment to reflect on the money we have wasted invested so that we might then waste invest our time into hopefully as many games as possible. Games that were purchased at a steep discount. Go back and look at your backlog, and see how far it has grown. The time has now come to decide which games to play first. Now that you know which games you should buy and which games you should have bought, you must be wondering which games to play in your backlog? Yes, the bloated, pre-hibernation bear belly that is your Steam games list must be dealt with. There’s a few ways to go about it.

You could close your eyes and click one but that would be silly. The key is to organize. Sort the games by genre, and then we get into the nitty gritty. Are you the type of person that tries out multiple games at the same time for just a few minutes and then you select the one you liked the best? Or do you play multiple games at the same time all the way through to their conclusion? Perhaps you are more traditional, and you refuse to start another game until you have finished the one you are on.

I hope that alchemist is mixin up a fine margarita

If you bought a huge crop of games, I recommend interspersing the casual, hop-in-and-play type games with the serious single player campaigns. That way you won’t get your stories confused, and gameplay is different so odds are you won’t confuse controls too much. So you can jump in and out of roguelikes while you stalk the streets of Dunwall at the same time.

But it doesn’t really matter what you do. Decide what is best for yourself. The seeds of your labor have been sown, oh farmer of digital wares, and now it is time to reap the crop. Get to it. Oh and you probably don’t need to buy this game. Verdict: Skip it.